Jest We Forget

Some famous Americans had a quirky sense of humor.

Rockport, Texas - Some of history’s most famous people were incurable practical jokers who delighted in making others the butt of their pranks. Even the White House has had its share of pranksters.

When Horace Norton, the founder of Norton College, met President Grant ln 1889. Grant gave the educator a fine cigar. Norton didn’t smoke it, but kept it as a memento of meeting the President. In 1932 Horace’s grandson, Winston Merton, decided to smoke that same cigar on the anniversary of the college. He made a grand speech about Grant’s fine character, then put a match to the end of the cigar - which exploded in Norton’s face. It seems Grant had given Merton’s grandfather a trick cigar.

Franklin D. Roosevelt often grew weary of White House formalities and loved to make shocking remarks to guests in the reception line. “I killed my grandmother this morning,” was a favorite comment he would deliver with a totally straight face. The startled expressions on guest’s faces as they stumbled for an appropriate response tickled F.D.R.’s funny bone. Once, however, a prominent banker proved to have a sense of humor equal to the presidents. Without missing a beat, he leaned close to the presidents ear and replied, “Hell, I’m sure she deserved it.”

Harry Truman would give pens as souvenirs to dignitaries who visited him in the Oval Office. On each pen was engraved, “Swiped from Harry Truman.” Overnight guests at the White House often commented about hearing strange noises and eerie conversations in the middle of the night. Truman always said the sounds were the ghosts of Lincoln and Jefferson talking as they walked the White House halls. However, when Truman left office, the ghosts seem to have mysteriously left also.

A Washington socialite once bragged to President Coolidge how she had bet a friend that she could get the president to say more than three words to her. Coolidge, famous for not talking much, sternly replied, “You lose,” and didn’t speak to her the rest of the night.

“l hold practical jokes in unlimited contempt,” Mark Twain once said. Yet the author wasn’t above pulling a gag or two himself. He once told a minister there was a book that contained every word of the sermon the preacher had delivered that morning. The minister vigorously denied it, claiming he’d written every word of the sermon himself. Twain insisted he had the book and promised to send the befuddled minister a copy of it. A week later the minister received a package, and was less than amused upon opening it. Inside the package was a card from Twain - and a dictionary.

World famous for his tricks, P.T. Barnum often said the public expected to be fooled by him. On one occasion he had the skeleton of a small monkey grafted to the tail of a large fish. He displayed the creation as the “Feejee Mermaid” at his American Museum in New York City.

Steel tycoon Andrew Carnegie once had his office invaded by a man who insisted that Carnegie should share his millions equally with all the people of the world. Furthermore, the intruder demanded his share immediately. Carnegie agreed, and quickly divided his wealth by the world’s population to determine the amount the man should receive. The greedy fellow did not leave sly old Carnegie’s office a wealthy man. Carnegie wrote a check for twenty-one cents, the mans “equal share” of Carnegie’s wealth when divided among the reported number of people in the world at the time. - Dean Terry